Last month there was no blog. My apologies to anyone waiting for it to be posted. I had a spinal operation on Friday, 28 March 2014. I realise now that my propensity for unbridled optimism can be problematic. Rather than write my monthly blog the week before, leaving it to be posted on 31 March, I was totally convinced that I could lie in my bed in hospital, at leisure, and type out whatever came into my head on that day. Really?
I made no allowance for being woken at 5am with tea which I didn't want, pain, a drain in my back, breakfast, tea, lunch, tea, dinner (at 5pm), visiting hours twice a day, nurses coming to take my blood pressure, shoot my temple with something that takes one's temperature in one second, bed-making and straightening, physiotherapists insisting that I do very uncomfortable exercises, doctor's cheerful visits lasting all of three minutes, the need to be bed bathed and later to shower myself with great effort, plus a myriad activities which I have forgotten. Added to this is the fact that I had zero inclination to write a blog.
I made no allowance for being woken at 5am with tea which I didn't want, pain, a drain in my back, breakfast, tea, lunch, tea, dinner (at 5pm), visiting hours twice a day, nurses coming to take my blood pressure, shoot my temple with something that takes one's temperature in one second, bed-making and straightening, physiotherapists insisting that I do very uncomfortable exercises, doctor's cheerful visits lasting all of three minutes, the need to be bed bathed and later to shower myself with great effort, plus a myriad activities which I have forgotten. Added to this is the fact that I had zero inclination to write a blog.
So here we are at the end of yet another month, and it is blog time once more. I have been convalescing with dear friends in the most gorgeous setting, being spoilt rotten, and with plenty of time to read, study, and wait on God. I jest. Not about my hosts, the beautiful surroundings, or being spoilt. I am joking about time to read, study, and wait on God! I really don't want to bore my readers with stories of my ailments. I am fairly certain that we all know people that we never dare greet with the polite question, "How are you?" These folk have never caught on to the fact that we really have no desire to know how they are. When we ask them how they are, to our horror and impatience, they tell us. At length. This leaves us no option but to shift from one leg to the other, trying to look interested, while feeling terribly aggrieved that they took our question literally.
A good friend of mine, Suzi Gand, is German, and is highly entertaining. Before she became a Christian she stole things. I can't remember all the details, but I know that it involved coat hangers, library books by the hundreds (I do hope I am not exaggerating), and a variety of other goods. When she became a Christian she was determined to return everything she had pilfered, which meant returning things, including coat hangers, to the shops from which she had stolen until they begged her to go away and not bring anything else back. It also meant returning ALL the library books which had been "borrowed" indefinitely. If you have ever had the unnerving experience of returning one or two library books a week or so late, you will know how unpleasant it is to confess your transgression to a librarian with no sense of humour. In my time I tried various light-hearted attempts at humour when I was "tardy" in returning library books. It is an occupational hazard. To qualify as a librarian you need to have your sense of humour cauterized. (It just occurs to me that if I have loaned you any of MY books and/or DVDs and you haven't returned them, now would be a good time to do so. I am not joking. When it comes to MY books and DVDs I have a lot of the librarian genes.) So I stand in awe of Suzi when I think of her lugging her loot back to the library!
That was just a short introduction to Suzi. She and her husband, Lucien, are elders in His Church. It occurs to me that at one point in his life Lucien was a policeman. Just saying! An ex-thief and an ex-policeman! Suzi, being German, was nonplussed by South Africans. I couldn't help finding it very funny when she told me about it. She said, "You know, Fiona, I find South Africans very rude. They ask me how I am, and then when I begin to tell them, they walk away. Why do they ask me if they don't want to know?" It is very difficult to explain the niceties of our culture. How do you tell someone that this is the opening gambit in conversation and that all South Africans understand that the accepted response is, "Fine thanks, and you?" Answer, "Good/fine/well thanks!" You are not allowed to say, "I feel terrible/At this precise moment I feel like kicking you in the head for talking to me/I have an ingrown toenail that is infected because I am too scared to have it dug out", or any other truthful answer.
Times with out number I have greeted someone with, "Oh, hello!" to be met by the reply, "Fine thanks, and you?" I have been guilty of phoning someone myself, and at the end of the conversation saying, "Thanks for calling. I need to rush off now!" After I have put the phone down I feel a sudden urge to call back to explain that I wasn't thinking, I had forgotten who called whom, or to turn it into a joke. Instead I bang my head against the nearest wall, figuring that I need a slap. I read about a man who tried something out at a wedding where he was a groomsman. This was in America where it is traditional for the bridal party to stand in a receiving line. All the guests file past, shaking hands and murmuring pleasantries. This man smiled at each guest, and in a conversational tone said to each in turn, "My grandmother just died." Not one guest paid any attention. The usual response was, "Oh really? How nice!" or similar platitudes.
This leads me to the conclusion that we are often guilty of being poor listeners as well as being so focused on ourselves that we are not interested in what is actually going on in the lives of people around us. Some atheists have accused Christians of making a god in their own image. In other words they deny the existence of God, and accuse us of needing to invent someone to worship. I think that if we did that we would be incapable of creating anything like our God. Any deity we created would be like all other man created "gods". We would invent a god who was self-centered and hard to please. Instead we know that the opposite is the truth.
Our God is the best Listener there is.
He also cares about each of us. David wrote these words in Psalm 34:17, 18
"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
I am so thankful that I know that when I tell God my woes He won't say, "Oh REALLY....." while He turns to Gabriel to talk about something far more interesting. How fantastic that we can pray (talk) to One Who is attentive and caring.
Until next month, God bless you, and I mean that.
Fiona
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